Is there anybody out there

I haven't posted in a while. It hasn't been because I haven't been writing.

OK.

That's a lie.

Having a child kind of sucks all the poetry out of you. Unless, of course, you are trying to rhyme something with the word "drool." The fact that I haven't slept a proper night's sleep in over two years may have something to do with it. I can feel the brain cells drying in my head. It could have something to do with the fact that I am in constant back pain most of my waking hours since giving birth.

It could also have something to do with the fact that I just don't see the world like I once did. Don't get me wrong, I love being a full-time mom. It's just that my creativity seems to be used up during my son's day on things like stories based on random objects (example: "Mommy, tell me a story about a basket." Huh??!!) or imaginative play (example: "Mommy, let's make a robot today!").

The other lack of motivation is that I am not really convinced that there is anyone in cyberspace that really gives a crap about what I am writing. Other than me, that is. If art is made in the forest, and there's no one there to appreciate or critique it, is it art?

An old friend once said that it takes seven-years for ideas to percolate. If you write about anything before that time, you have no perspective. This may be true (damn it!) since my mind has been wandering back in time recently. One day words may come, but still nothing yet.

Happiness is also not very motivating. And frankly, I have never been happier in my life than I am right at this moment. Sadness, despair, drunkenness (thanks Buk) all seem much more interesting topics to write (and read) about than happy happy happy happy. I can't think of anything more interesting to write about it than:

I'm so fucking happy I could burst.

Which, while profound in it's own right (how many people can actually say that?) doesn't really equal a poem.

Maybe it's all these things. Maybe it's just an extended writer's block. Maybe I'm over thinking it. Maybe I should just write down some god-damn words and see what happens...